The inferiority complex - do not revel worthlessness

December 10, 2013

 The inferiority complex
 We all compare ourselves with others. Media for twenty-four hours a day tell us about the beautiful, rich, talented people, creating the impression that we all know them personally. And as we compare ourselves with those who know many of us it seems own insignificance in comparison with others, that is an inferiority complex.

The inferiority complex - is the general feeling that you are worse than others, do not meet a certain standard, and practically flawed. It is very important to distinguish between "feeling" and "know". For example, you can know that you are much poorer than Bill Gates, that get you very far in terms of intellectual development to Stephen Hawking, the world and that there are millions of men who find you attractive enough. This objective knowledge that can not worry you at all. In fact, everyone knows that in some way he is worse than others, and it does not affect his life and attitude. A man with an inferiority complex feeling that it is worse than others, although objectively it may be something better than many. This feeling has little to do with reality: sometimes the best students feel that learning worse than others, but a very successful and productive at work people find that work less and worse than all the others.


The reasons for the inferiority complex

The inferiority complex is rooted in the following views:

  • You should be as good as other people.
  • You feel that you are worse than others, though not understand why.

As a result, there is a feeling that is not based on rational judgments, and in many ways this is why it has a lot of power over man. The reasons for which a person may experience similar views, are very diverse. For example, some people of their own parents since childhood say they are somewhat worse than others (for example, criticized the appearance of his daughter, comparing her with the other). Excessive parental care can also cause an inferiority complex - the person does not learn to make their own decisions, and when it detects that the majority of people are more or less well able to do it, he develops psychological problems. The presence of physical defects, even minor, sometimes also leads to inferiority complex - especially if the person because they teased at school if they are constantly reminded of the parents.


The inferiority complex and behavior

  • Overcompensation - it is one of the most famous defense mechanisms of the psyche. A person suffering from an inferiority complex, it may try to suppress others, showing by his behavior that he is better than them.
  • Barriers. As a person with an inferiority complex says that it is much worse than the others, it can begin to create barriers that prevent people around to see his flaws - real or imaginary. Such barriers may serve as an unsociable and arrogant behavior, and significant achievements that occur in spite of the complex. Often people with an inferiority complex trying to be the best in everything, so as not to give others a chance to see their shortcomings. At first glance, it's not bad, but in fact such a person never really does not enjoy success - he continues to think about how to hide from the rest of their weaknesses and barriers around it are higher and stronger.
  • Anxiety. If a person can not build barriers around them, starts to operate a different mechanism - anxiety. Because of anxiety Anxiety - how to distinguish normal from disease?  Anxiety - how to distinguish normal from disease?
   People avoid people and situations that remind him of his inferiority complex - for example, in public appearances, dating the opposite sex, and so on.
  • Increased sensitivity to criticism. Many people barely tolerate criticism - even the most constructive, but from the perspective of a person with an inferiority complex criticism - is a successful attempt to disclose its own nullity. So he, if possible, try not to hear criticism, and if that fails, it will be hard to deny what he is told.


How to cope with inferiority complex

Find the specific reasons why you think you are worse than others .  Do not rest until you get away from you the answer to the question "what exactly are you worse? "; also worth investigating in fact, worse than anyone exactly what you think yourself .  You can not be the worst of all - the planet is living a very different seven billion people .  Compare it with what people makes you feel worthless? With rich? Talented? Beautiful? What's the name of these people? If you come to the conclusion that he considered himself worse than beauty from next door, decide exactly what it is better than you, then - you're better than her .  For example, it is objectively more beautiful, slimmer you, she has more fans, but you can have a higher level of education, a prestigious job, you are much more likely to travel .  Chances are good that a few things of what you have, it might even be envied .  Even more likely, that as soon as you call the specific reasons for his "nothingness", they will seem frivolous .  Indeed, it is one thing - to consider themselves worse than all, and quite another - to worry about what you're not as slim as your neighbor .

Refuse imitations. Yet no matter whose gravestone is not written, "There is Masha. It was no worse than his neighbor. " Wanting to be someone normal in fifteen years, but after twenty it is a sign of psychological immaturity. Inferiority complex thrives in the hearts of people who want to be someone else, but not themselves. Meanwhile, it is a difficult, but much more interesting and, ultimately, only it can make your life really full.

Dare to be different. At 21, you need to finish college, 25 - have a job and be married, no later than 27 - to give birth to their first child, a 30 - second. This is only part of the requirements, which makes us a society. We compare ourselves with the standard and, if we find a lot of differences, we begin to consider themselves inferior. But society demands it from us in order for us to become happy, and that we were comfortable, predictable citizens, taxpayers and consumers. There is nothing wrong to be so, but if you know you want to live differently, that is no reason to consider themselves inferior.

Article Tags:
  • psychological complexes

The mystery of female beauty - mystery and femininity

December 8, 2013

 female beauty
   We affirm that all people are different, we want to be unique, and at the same time - are committed to the same goals. One of these objectives - the beauty, including - the beauty of women, which is always desirable for both women and men. But what is - a woman's beauty?


The canons of female beauty: History

The concept of female beauty in the history of mankind has changed more than once. Standards of beauty were women with pale faces and tanned, and full, and very thin; also changes the perception of the beautiful women's clothing, hair, makeup.

Venus figurines is considered the first symbol of feminine beauty: a generic name statues of women who belong to the prehistoric era. They have little in common with what we today call the feminine beauty: a very wide hips, fat folds, often - sagging breasts. However, it is this female figure, apparently, it symbolized fertility: a woman with the body bore and nursed more than one child, and it is revered and immortalized in stone.

In ancient Greece and Rome valued women with fair skin, golden hair and beautiful curves of the body. Get an accurate representation of the Greek and Roman ideals of beauty can be looking at the marble sculptures of ancient goddesses - first of all, Aphrodite and Venus: to them and tried to be like a woman of flesh and blood.

To cause the complexion to the standards of beauty, a resident of Greece used white lead, and Roman used less dangerous means - chalk and orris root. Both in Greece and in Rome, women used the spices Spices - delicious slimming  Spices - delicious slimming
   red tones to create a blush, and antimony - for eyeliner and eyebrows.

In the Middle Ages, beauty was considered sinful and dangerous; it was supposed to hide, so as not to tempt others, so this era can not boast of Venus and Aphrodite. Since the beginning of the Renaissance artists began to sing again feminine beauty. Shakespeare in his sonnets devoted much attention to the physical characteristics of women: as a rule, they had white skin, rosy cheeks, red lips, firm and white chest. In general, very light skin and soft hair and delicate features in the Renaissance indicated belong women to the higher strata of society (those who engaged in physical labor, especially - in the open air, the skin was tanned and reddened, and facial features, usually rude). As wealth and high social status in those days was the main factors influencing the perceptions of beauty, it was these women recognize beautiful.

Bright, even sickly pale skin remained a mandatory attribute of female beauty to the 1940s, when Coco Chanel with her characteristic determination, introduced the fashion for a tan, which, however, became really popular only in the late twentieth century. Soon new and world-renowned standard of beauty became Marilyn Monroe, and she had nothing to do with the pale beauties prim Victorian era and early 20th century. Thanks to her in the following decades were popular feminine shapes with rounded shapes, light hair, and neat makeup no-frills: red lipstick, black mascara and a little eyeliner.

In the eighties there was a complete transformation of the standard of female beauty: the beauty ideal have become very slim and athletic, and facial features and skin color were suddenly less important than weight. Inimitable Marilyn Monroe was considered plump, and by some measures at all thick. Diets guilt in those who do not sit on a diet, as well as hostility, almost an aversion to excess weight was a sign of the times. To eliminate bends that were previously considered appetizing, women have to deprive yourself of your favorite foods and squeeze out all the juices in the gym. Today, weight loss is also a popular topic, which is discussed in the media, and a cup of coffee with a friend, but is becoming less of women who through diet and exercise seek to acquire boyish figure. After several deaths of models from anorexia Anorexia nervosa - symptoms and effects on the body  Anorexia nervosa - symptoms and effects on the body
   began to return to the podium shapes with feminine curves, and advertising is increasingly possible to see models of non-standard sizes. In this society obsessed with beauty as ever: the cosmetic industry, cosmetic procedures, plastic surgery offer new ways to become more beautiful, and arrived in these areas is constantly increasing.


What makes a woman beautiful

I guess anyone would agree that plastic surgery and cosmetics can not give a real beauty, though they are really capable of much. Nevertheless, creams and scalpel insufficient.

A key factor is the beauty of women - is her health. Usually we think about it only when faced with a disease, but in fact it is obvious that good health - a beautiful skin Beautiful skin - achieving  Beautiful skin - achieving
 , Shiny hair, and enough energy to cope with daily activities, and openly smiling outside world. Exercise, a balanced diet and regular examination by a doctor is much more important for the beauty than cosmetics expensive - it will be powerless, if there were serious health problems.

Another important attribute of female beauty - it is, no matter how trivial, femininity. A woman can be beautiful, but if it looks like a woman. This does not mean that you can not wear short hair, jeans and sneakers; femininity starts from within, from the feeling like a woman, and of appropriate behavior.

Finally, the inner harmony - a factor which, without being seen, has a huge impact on the external beauty. If a woman does not love himself, he has no particular purpose in life, constantly experiencing dissatisfaction with himself and life is subtly reflected in her appearance. And usually the most beautiful women who know themselves and are not afraid to be themselves - that they are able to take a man as he is, and it attracts them. Of course, do not forget about maintaining a healthy weight and a manicure, but still working on outer beauty, it is necessary in parallel to work on the inside - then you can be beautiful, even if you do not naturally perfectly symmetrical face, and not the slim figure Practical tips for a slim figure  Practical tips for a slim figure

Article Tags:
  • psychological help