- The age difference between spouses: what is optimal?
Especially popular among the marriages peers were in the days of the Soviet Union sunk into oblivion. Then it was thought that between a man and a woman should not have any outstanding differences, neither in work nor in his personal life. Therefore marriages among people whose age was about the same, welcomed, any deviations from the norm were condemned. Many representatives of the sixties generation learned at school, college, and then quickly and without unnecessary preparations have families.
Statistics confirm that marriages between same age in our time - it is early marriage. Indeed, young people up to twenty years often marry the girl of his age category.
Plus, in a lot of marriages. This common interest, a common circle of friends, about the same life experiences and future prospects. This means that spouses are pulling the wagon family life almost equal to the speed driven and the like luggage.
But the disadvantages in such families abound. There are too similar to each other, the couple can quickly become bored with each other, because in a few years they will be able to almost one hundred percent probability to predict the actions of each other and guess the thought. In addition, the absence of a more experienced partner, especially in young families face many rash acts, stupid mistakes and frequent quarrels for no reason.
Men over women
This is a classic relationship. At various times the permissible age of courtship was different, but always he began with 30 years. The man rose to his feet, getting a profession, acquire experience, defined in the purposes and desires and could support a family. Until the twentieth century, it was quite common, when a young girl courted by a man fifty years, and it is not in doubt either the girl or the society.
Nowadays, marriages are quite common when a man older woman. Sometimes the difference is practically imperceptible and is 3-5 years. Sometimes it is much more. It has been observed that a better society perceives couples where the man over the woman no more than ten years. A more serious age difference between spouses could cause misunderstanding between them and the relatives, colleagues and friends. But rejecting prejudices in such marriages can find pluses.
Families with a man older women are considered more robust. In such a relationship the husband plays the role of undisputed leader, he is able to keep emotions
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and not to provoke a quarrel, it is ready to provide his wife and children, ready to make concessions, and can not make mistakes inherent in youth. Wife with a husband may feel like a stone wall.
But at the same time, in these families the husband often becomes a dictator whose word always be decisive. The wife may feel the lack of fresh air, because virtually all solutions is ready to accept a husband for her, and not all of these solutions can be to your taste. In addition, if the age difference is really great and is 20, 30 or even 40 years, there are cases when the wife becomes boring monotonous life is measured with an elderly spouse, and she goes to the younger fans.
Such relationships have a chance only if a male adult will not lose respect for his young wife, and not be afraid to trust her making some decisions that the wife's shoulder.
Women older than men
Stories are cases of successful marriages where the wife was much older than her husband. But, nevertheless, it was such marriages are most condemned by society and rarely find understanding.
Although such marriages are not uncommon, they are still not considered to be traditional, no matter what. The reasons for which women decide to marry a man younger than herself, a lot. This can be as much love and whimsy as untapped maternal instincts, or just a coincidence.
The family in which a woman over a man, has all chances to become strong. If the age difference between spouses at least five years, they almost do not notice it, and together will be most difficult moments of crisis. If the age difference is more than ten years, problems in relationships
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It may not be, but is likely to be much less.
The undoubted advantage of such relations can be regarded as the desire to preserve a woman's marriage. Psychologists say that in families where the husband is much younger, women feel greater responsibility for those relationships and making significant efforts to ensure that they do not spoil. In addition, experienced a wife who will not arrange hysterics, always understand and support - a find for any young man, because with a young wife would have to go through many quarrels and disputes.
The drawback of this, perhaps more. A man often feels on the sidelines in such a relationship that few people are satisfied. In addition, having gone from a single mother, her husband suddenly falls into the arms of another, and when they grow up, genuinely surprised, why he can not start to live an independent life. Often women simply suppress a man with his authority and experience, leaving no chance to the husband somehow manifested itself. Cases and outbreaks of jealousy
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to younger girls and trying to control every step of her husband.
So, any relationship has both drawbacks and advantages. There is no universal recipe for happiness, there is no secret, that would help the couple make their family is perfect. Sometimes marriages are falling apart and that everything felt perfect, and those which have not even talked seriously, are the most robust. In relations between the spouses age - not the most important thing and not the worst obstacle. Love, mutual respect, lack of prejudices and complexes - that is the only guarantee to get a good chance to mention diamond wedding, no matter what.