How to raise a woman among boys
May 30, 2012
- How to raise a woman among boys
- Positive aspects
She climbs trees, rides a bike, playing soccer and cars, hunts for insects and frogs, loves to run a race, and video games, it is difficult to put in something other than jeans. And she loves her brothers and practically does not leave them. Classic example tomboy. Rather, it is - the only girl in a large family. She soon adopts the behavior of older brothers, because she needs to win recognition in the man's world, meet the expectations. She needs to "fit in" and be "the guy." So are all the only daughter in large families are doomed to the fate of a tomboy or can still raise a woman among the boys?
Psychologists argue that the formation of the personality of the child should take place regardless of family composition
. Attentive parents always try to figure out how to promote the development of the child's personality
. Parents, daughter and several sons, risk of stroke in one of two extremes - or they will treat it in the same way as with her brothers, or turn into a little princess
. Meanwhile, constantly pushing the girl in a certain predetermined direction, whether it is a bias toward male or female - hence impede the development of its unique personality and own character
. Some of the girls on the nature of feminine and behave accordingly, but others are more influenced by external circumstances and environment
. Therefore, parents play a key role in the education of the lady boys
. It is the parents should send the girl and help her to become a woman
. This process requires on the part of both girls and their parents, begins in early childhood
What to look for in the education of girls
To raise the lady, it is important to impress the girl child, she is different from his brothers. Boys grow into men, my father, and the girl will grow up and become a woman, as a mother. Often girls perceive themselves as well as their surrounding boys. They play and interact in the same company, in the broad sense of this perception is quite natural and normal, but understanding the differences before the girls from the boys psychologically prepare it allows for differences that will appear later. It also gives her a chance to express themselves and develop their own scenario, that is, the freedom to be a lady, and do not always behave like a boy. Even small gestures and actions of parents can have a tremendous impact on the formation of femininity girl.
Pay attention to the daughter of the important nuances, such as voice. Remind her that she would be a woman, and women quiet melodious voice, not loud and rough. Be prepared for the fact that your little girl will shout the loudest boys, but from time to time asking her to use "feminine" voice. Explain the difference between a loud sharp tone, relevant in the rough world of boyish, friendly and relaxed tone to be used by the girls. Perhaps these details some time will remain incomprehensible to her, because almost all the time she spends with his brothers. Help his daughter to "find" her female voice (of course, in private, let it be your little secret). Explain that a daughter, when you need to use that voice; for example, in the room in front of the guests, in a conversation with young children / puppets, and in conversation with friends.
Tell her daughter about the differences in the behavior of boys and girls
. Your girl from childhood to accept the natural functions of the body as something funny, do not you believe her brothers
. Moreover, most likely, the brothers will be very proud to have taught her sister to publish any obscene noises, and encourage participation in all sorts of competitions like "Who puknet louder" or "fanciful who otrygnet"
. And how happy they are watching as a sister show their skills podrugamyu Naturally, this encouragement and pride girl blossoms
. Parents have the responsibility to devote it to the wisdom of a true feminine behavior; teach her to sit, walk, shop, tea, etc.
. Parents should teach her daughter to behave as befits a girl, explain what actions are permissible only in the game with his brothers and totally unacceptable in a different society
. Girls do not belch the alphabet in public, girls do not pee on the street and do not fight with friends
. The only girl in a family in need of parental guidance and leadership to learn to recognize what actions are allowed for the lady, and what - no
Girly accessories and hobbies
Girl, growing up in a male environment, need some very girly accessories
. Some girls like such little things, the other - seem ridiculous
. But in order to learn how to be a lady, necessary accessories, for example, some women's garments, even if the clothes fit her older brothers
. It is not that from head to toe decorating girl pink bows and ruffles, turning it into a kind of cake, but some attributes appearance girl - bow or band in her hair, shoes, tights or socks for girls, bag, doll, girly pajamas ball with floral print, hat, dress, little pink clothes, books, focused on girls - will not be superfluous
. These accessories will clearly show the girl, what are the specific differences between boys and girls, and prepare it for a harmonious transition to the age of the girl
. Do not forbid my daughter to play with his brothers, do not scold her manner of dress or play, just acquaint her with a lady of your surroundings
. All children need individual attention, but when in a large family, only one girl, she must have special privileges, especially in the cultivation of femininity, psychological advice
In addition, girls who are bringing up boys, you need comfort and a change of scenery. She must have their own space where she can find peace and to do what is interesting only to her, not adjusting to the tastes of the brothers. For single girls in a large family of naturally desire to spend some time alone. Give the daughter the freedom and the space to be herself. Encourage her desire for independence and unwillingness to be like brothers. Find interesting lesson for her daughter - ballet, dancing, watercolor painting, fashion and so on. Give it the right choice and the right to engage in some very "girly" business. Make sure that her daughter had been close friends for games and socializing.
How to talk to your child about sex and sexual maturation
April 16, 2012
- How to talk to your child about sex and sexual maturation
When your child reaches the age of puberty
Puberty child - stages of a complex path
You need to think about that from the general talk about sex go on to discuss more specific topics related to sexuality
Nine ways to experience their sexuality
your son or daughter. You decide that you dedicate a separate conversation, or will gradually prepare the child to physical changes, pending his body during puberty, but he should be ready for them.
Girls need to know about the growth of breasts and body hair, especially pubic hair and armpits, as well as the beginning of the reproductive cycle and menstruation
. A major role in clarifying and familiarizing belongs to mothers, sisters, grandmothers and school doctors
. Even with ten or eleven years old girl need to prepare for the changes that will happen to her, in an accessible way to tell what is menstruation, about its inevitability, to explain the girl naturalness of this phenomenon and introduce rules necessary these days care
. Do not be amiss to describe the internal structure of the female genitals
. The main thing that she realized that this was not some kind of pathology, and the establishment of an adult woman, preparation for a responsible and honorable mission - to become a mother
. Knowledge about the physiology of menstruation can help prevent future unwanted pregnancies through ignorance or excessive curiosity
. If you maintain a close relationship with his daughter and communicate on the topic of ongoing changes to it, you can help her to better adapt to the challenges of adolescence
Transitional age - the period of emotional turmoil
Boys need to know that they are also expected to change: deepening of the voice, the growth of reproductive organs and body hair. We need to tell them about nocturnal emissions - involuntary ejaculation during sleep
Dreams: how to understand our dreams
(so-called "wet dreams"), to explain that this is not a sign of illness or sexual deviation. Night wet-dream - normal physiological phenomenon, repeated about once or twice a week and less before the start of a regular sexual life. The onset of nocturnal pollutions in adolescents suggests they reach a certain stage of puberty.
Parents should discuss with your child his growing interest in the opposite sex. As a boy and a girl must be prepared for attention from the opposite sex. During this period, parents need to revise some of the rules of conduct established for the child, in particular concerning the relationship with the opposite sex. Of course, you should explain to your child that he still engage in sex early, but what about other forms of physical contact, such as kissing and fondling?
Most likely, the parents and the excitement increased attention to the subject of sex education will cause confusion in the child, "Dad, Mom, I'm not going with anyone to have sex, okay? Which is why all the fuss? ". But your son or daughter must understand that any physical contact, even an innocent touch, makes you want more and eventually leads to intimacy. Sex - the car that rolls downhill: the further you go down, the harder it is to stop. This in itself is not bad or wrong - so the person is arranged. And since sex is your son or daughter will be able to a few years, it is important to convince them that this car it is better not to sit down.