Unfortunately, the gender statistics does not change over the years, and ten girls, on average, still accounts for nine children, and in any age group. This fabulous heroines almost did not have to put any effort to subdue the man of her dreams: he declared at the right time and confirmed its status as unthinkable feats. In real life women sit idly by is not necessary - or loneliness can not be avoided.

"I first had not acquainted with the men! "" I never meant showing that he cares about me! "- Repeat some of the fair sex. And do not suspect miserable, that their views are hopelessly outdated. Of course, every rule there are exceptions, and there are damsels of unearthly beauty and charm, which is absolutely no need to take the initiative first: men themselves enthusiastically stacked in neat piles at their feet. But if talking about the story of ordinary women - the best of attractive, reasonably intelligent, reasonably able to make an impression, but quite ambitious in the desire to build a better personal life, all the dogma with the particle "no" immediately lose their power. Women's initiative was not punished - it just has to be competent. And then conquer a man is not difficult.

Art to ask questions

The question that haunts many women, especially the young, is formulated like this: the first to get acquainted with a man or not? The fears are unnecessary. If you likable man, then why not try? Nobody is forcing you to throw herself on his neck, shouting, "Oh, how I like you! "But to demonstrate their affection for him is not forbidden - most men regard as a signal to the acquaintance was a smile of the woman or her intriguing and friendly look. Then they are ready to act on a clear plan, secure in the knowledge that they themselves have chosen a woman among many.

Spoke to the man, too, can be a first: the innocent is full. Ladies, gentlemen, in contrast to the streets almost no friends, and prefer to do it at work, in public places - various shops, theaters, exhibitions and so on. Accordingly, we can ask the man any thematic issue - for example, to ask him about the quality of the goods, which he is going to get, ask for his advice in choosing a technology, to ask his opinion about the performance. After the first question to ask is not forbidden, and the second and third, in the course of a conversation to ask the source, what's his name, and after a minute or two, all the while continuing as a lively talk, refer to him by name and make a compliment Compliments and their meaning: do not mistake the words   - At least to thank for the fact that he explained everything in detail to you. And believes that the introduction took place.

Magic Gestures

How would punning as it may sound, but the man responds to a woman when he sees her as a woman. And being a woman - it means not only to wear fashionable and elegant clothes, stylish hair and use a good perfume. In this concept, first of all, include the ability to speak the language of his body, that is, mastery of tone of voice, the ability to emphasize the dignity of his clothes and hide figure flaws, without stooping to vulgarity. And it is certainly all sorts of gestures, it is no wonder they say that every gesture has its own unique value.

Seductive overtones are such movements as subtle swinging one foot, leg position crosswise, provided that the woman sitting on a chair and her wearing a short skirt. Men's fantasy is played out when a woman holds her hands through his hair and straightens them, licks his lips tongue tip, adjusts straps sundress or underwear, tilted so that after cleavage becomes visible part of the chest. Indifferent the stronger sex and such a spectacle when the lady in front of them playing with various objects, whether glass, cigarettes, fruits and so forth, or eating ice cream.

Seduction and conquest of man is akin to an exciting game. And if your partner is indifferent to all your initiatives, especially frustrated not worth it - after all, it may be very good reasons to refuse the continuation of dating. And you reappear freedom of choice, because everything that happens - for the better.

Svetlana Usankova

Psychologists and researchers have proposed a number of different theories of love. Love - a basic human emotion Emotions and culture: how to decipher the emotional code But to understand how and why it occurs is not so simple. In fact, for a long time, people thought that love - it is something that science can not explain.

Here are the four main theories that are intended to explain the sympathy, love and emotional attachment.

Sympathy vs. love

Psychologist Zick Rubin proposed that romantic love is made up of three elements: attachment, caring and intimacy. Affection - is the need to receive care, approval and physical contact from another person. Caring - attention to the needs of the other person and his happiness is the same as his. Proximity - the opportunity to share thoughts, desires and feelings with the other person.

Based on these definitions, Rubin developed a questionnaire that helps evaluate the attitude to people and determine where your feelings are on the scale of love and sympathy scale.

Passionate love vs. Love

According to the theory of the psychologist Elaine Hatfield and her colleagues, there are two basic types of love - passionate and friendly. Friendly characterized by mutual respect, affection and trust. Such love usually grows out of a sense of mutual understanding and respect for each other.

Passionate love is defined by strong emotions, sexual attraction, anxiety and affection. When these intense emotions are reciprocated, people feel satisfied and winged. Unrequited love this type leads to feelings of dependence and despair. Hatfield suggests that passionate love is limited in time, it usually lives from 6 to 30 months.

Hatfield also suggests that passionate love arises when cultural expectations provoke love, when you meet a person, like your idealized notions of love and when you feel good mood in the presence of another person.

Ideally, passionate love leads to friendly love, which is much more durable. While most people are hungry for relationships that combine the confidence and stability of the friendly love with the intense emotions of passionate love, Hatfield believes that this is a rare case.

The model of love in the form of a color wheel

In the book "Colors of Love" John Lee compares the kinds of love with the color wheel. Just as there are three primary colors, Lee suggests three basic types of love - eros, and storge lyudos.

Continuing the analogy with the color wheel, Lee suggests that the primary colors can be mixed to create complementary colors, so there are three other kinds of love. For example, eros and ludus, when combined, give mania, obsessive love-obsession.

Types of love for Lee

Three main types of

• Eros - love for the ideal man
• Ludus - love of the game
• Storge - Love as friendship

Three other kinds of love:

• Mania (Eros + ludus) - love-obsession
• Pragma (ludus + storge) - a realistic and practical love
• Agape (Eros + storge) - selfless love

Triangular Theory of Love

Psychologist Robert Sternberg proposed to represent love in the form of a combination of three components: intimacy, passion and devotion. Different combinations of these three components create different kinds of love. For example, a combination of intimacy and devotion leads to compassionate love, while a combination of passion and intimacy - a passionate love.

According to Sternberg, relationships built on two or more components that are more resistant than those that rely only on one component. Sternberg uses the term "perfect love" to describe a combination of intimacy, passion and devotion. Although this kind of love is the most powerful and stable, Sternberg suggests that it is rare.