Probably every parent at least once in his life heard the word in his address: "You izbaluete your child! "But who is - a spoiled child, and how do you know that if your offspring as such?

How to understand that the child is spoiled

The following symptoms often indicate that parents are too spoiled child:

• Frequent failures of food

A spoiled child is not refusing to eat at all - he just did not want to eat what he cooked. It often happens that parents set the table, the child sits down and looks at the plate, and requires something else. If this happens a couple of times a year - nothing terrible, and if your child has a food intolerance Food intolerance - why is it there? It goes without saying that he needed a special meal. However, if a child almost every day refuses to eat what was prepared for the whole family, it's a sign of spoiled. The answer to the request (or rather, the requirement) of the child to give him French fries, pizza or something else that is not in today's menu should be simple: "do not want to eat what is on the plate - do not eat at all." If a five year old will miss dinner, nothing terrible will happen, but for dinner it will be less fastidious in food. If the child is older, you can invite him to prepare what he wants to eat. At the same time most of the work he must do himself, and prepare not only themselves, but also on the rest of the home.

• Tantrums

Generally, occasional tantrums in children aged up to four years are normal. At this age, children begin to define themselves are small, and do it often, in response to the failure of certain requirements of the parents (for example, they do not want to eat, dress, go for a walk, and so on). When parents insist failure turns into a tantrum. However, if a child of six beats in hysterics because he did not buy the coveted toy, it is a sign of spoiled and obvious attempt to manipulate their parents. Most experts recommend to ignore the tantrums, as difficult as it may seem - when the child realizes that the manipulation did not work out, he'll find a way to more easily talk about their desires.

• Extreme dependence on parents

Spoiled children can not sleep if their parents are not around, would not want to stay home with a babysitter or grandmother, struggling in hysterics when you have to go to kindergarten or to school, or when the mother leaves the house for a couple of hours. Until about four years, that's fine, but at an older age, the child must learn to safely manage for a while without parents. It's sad, but to blame for such a relationship is usually the parents of children. We need to overcome dependency, despite the tantrums and tears, otherwise it will have serious consequences for the future of human life.

How to deal with spoiled

• Set clear rules for security

For example - "never touch a hot stove," or "never cross the road at a red light." Do not give your child a reason to think that sometimes the rules can be broken - for example, do not run across the street at a red light with it, even if you see that the machine is not nearby. Violation of the rules your child will have the impression that in certain circumstances it is possible to circumvent any rules.

• Set clear rules for social interaction

Teach him to thank people for services, politely ask when he needs something, do not swear, do not insult other people, and themselves follow the same rules that you set.

• Frankly with their children about their behavior

Children of school (or even pre-school age) it is able to analyze their behavior, so they can and need to talk. To talk did not seem like an interrogation, instead of questions like, "Why are you doing this" use phrases such as "I always think, why you do it ...". Taking a break, and let your child finish the sentence for you. Let him know that you will not scold him for being frank, no matter what he will tell you; instead - Discuss heard. So you can learn a lot not only about the child, but also about themselves and their parenting practices.

• keep calm

This is the only way to control the situation; do not allow yourself to raise your voice and, especially, raise your hand.

• Be consistent

Always promises. If you told your child that will leave it without a meal, if he does not eat what is cooked - to do so. If you repeat the twentieth time, "Well, all this time exactly stay hungry", the child is simply ignoring your words, because remember that the last time the threats were empty.

Bad advice: The best way to pamper your child

• Make the child's center of the universe

If the child wishes for you in any situation is a priority, do not be surprised when you discover that he is hopelessly spoiled. Parents, ready on demand to perform the whim of a child, do not let him learn to reckon with the wishes and needs of others. Children need to understand that they can not just take, you also need to give - is one of the most important skills for life.

• Ignore the good behavior of the child

If you do not praise the child when he does something good, it would be difficult to understand how the behavior you like. If, moreover, you pay attention to the child, but when he cries, he does not need much time to understand - the tears and tantrums are a way to manipulate their parents.

• Do not set clear prohibitions and restrictions

A person becomes a part of human society in the process of education. If you have a child does not establish clear rules of behavior for the child, it will behave as it comes to mind, and this is in no way to blame.

• Lead by example

If you are behaving like a spoiled child, what to expect from young children? Do not complain and do not feel sorry for yourself (at least in the presence of children) and do not try to manipulate your husband or partner - children surprisingly quickly adopt habits of adults.

For thousands of years the dark forces in the myths associated with the left side. In the seventeenth century it was believed that the devil baptize his followers with his left hand; in France, there was a belief that witches greet the devil left hand. In addition, people believe that they can see spirits, just by looking over the left shoulder - because of left shoulder is the devil. And these are just some of the many superstitions associated with left-handers.

According to research, people are predominantly right-handed for more than 500,000 years. However, ten to twelve percent of people prefer to use his left hand. Scientists have been studying the lefties and righties - and often get amazing results.

Obvious differences

For example, in one experiment, it was found that more susceptible fear hander than right-handed. Participants were shown an episode from the movie "Silence of the Lambs." After looking at the left-handers to detect more PTSD symptoms than right-handers. Of course, one study is not enough to make solid conclusions, however, the results are of considerable interest.

Lefties are more prone to negative emotions Emotions and culture: how to decipher the emotional code Including anger, than right-handers. At the same time, they are more cautious in their decision-making - are inclined to doubt, can long ponder further action, afraid to make mistakes.

In another study, participants handed out sheets of paper, divided into two sections, and asked them to draw a zebra in a part of the sheet, which is associated, in their opinion, with good things and a panda - in the one that is associated with the bad. Most righties painted zebra on the right and left-handers - left. This may indicate that, despite the fact that culture and language make us associate the right side of the good things (just cause, for example), the left-hander is associated with good things left.

It is known that the left-hander succeed not only in art, but also, for example, in politics. Incumbent President Barack Obama is a lefty, like Bill Clinton, Bush, Reagan and Ford. Experts say that the politicians-handers have an advantage over their opponents right-handed. Wanting to reinforce the most important for their theses with the help of gestures, politicians usually use their dominant hand. But from the point of view of the audience - gestures occur on the left side. Gestures lefties viewers (at least, the right-hander) perceive more positive, so from their point of view, it comes from the right.

Features brain

As is known, the human brain is divided into two hemispheres. The left hemisphere works more efficiently; it is responsible for it, logical thinking, analysis, and so on. Normally, the left hemisphere is dominant and, as it controls the right half of the body, most people are right-handed.

The right hemisphere of the brain is the source of dreams Dreams: how to understand our dreams , Fantasy, creativity and feelings. It is dominant in left-handers. Almost half of the left-handers use the right hemisphere for speech; some of them a letter is completely controlled by the right hemisphere of the brain. There is a tendency to attribute more lefthanders development of creative abilities, but this is not true. Their abilities in all fields, including science and art, are as different as right-handers. On the development of certain abilities affects not only the dominant hemisphere, but also many other factors.

Genetics

It is established that parents lefties most likely birth of children who become left-handed. It's not just that some children copy the actions of their parents, and may begin to eat and write the same hand as the parents. Children who have one of the biological parents was left-handed, is likely to become left-handed, even if their adopted family of right-handers, and vice versa. On the other hand, we know that many parents are still trying to re-educate their children, if they see that their dominant hand - the left. Often they succeed, but experts say that retraining is not good for children. It is unlikely to lead to serious violations, but can interfere with the child to develop its full potential.