Each had ever watched a scene that has become a classic, when a child asks something of his mother, is refused, he immediately falls to the floor and starts beating on him, writhing and screaming loudly. This spectacle is hostility in the audience, and the parents just plunges into shock. But public "performance" of children - just the tip of the iceberg. The main problems of the parents of these children waiting at home. What leads to children's tantrums Children's tantrums - how to behave?   and how to avoid them?

Causes of childhood tantrums

Reason, by and large, one - the child's nervous system is unable to cope with the received stimuli, which manifests a violent reaction.

By hysterical attacks result in several factors, among which the leaders are: fatigue, hunger and lack of coordination between the parents. Hungry or tired child feels discomfort in the first place, which can not yet be associated with a specific cause, and therefore to his irritation can cause any, most insignificant factor.

On the uncoordinated actions of the parents is to dwell, as it is - a factor that needs careful correction of all family members. What actions parents can provoke tantrums? This, of course, a situation where a parent prohibits what another permits or prohibits not always, that is, there is no consistency and predictability in the behavior of the parents.

How does a child in hysterics

Children prone to hysterical attacks are usually very sensitive and smart enough to track favorable to the causal connection, but otherwise they do not differ from their peers.

Hysterical seizures can develop anywhere, one thing remains unchanged: a number have to be sympathetic, and what they will be bigger, the better, which is why this condition often develops on the street, in shops and other public places.

However, the same child may at one parent hysterical, while the other not to think about it - it depends on the response of the individual parent.

The very hysteria manifested in various ways, most often two forms:

• Hysterical screams and weeping - the most common form in which the child is taken by the hand and walks for parents, but at the same time as shouts that attracts the attention of others, as a result he achieves the desired: the parents quickly leave the store, or buy suddenly need a toy.
• Fall, screams and crimping on the floor - less common form of hysteria that affects the surrounding stronger, and the child will achieve goals.

How to prevent a tantrum and what to do if it started

Wean baby hysterical possible only with the concerted actions of all members of the family.

It is necessary that the child lived in the well-established regime of the day, that would not change the mood of the parents or their absence. This is the most important thing, as in this case, the child knows the sequence of the day, get used to it at the level of reflexes and becomes a feeling of confidence and serenity.

If the child is hungry (looks at the fridge, check the plates, said a stomach ache) - you need to feed. The need for food - one of the basic needs of the body. If the time is close to the main meal - it can move slightly if more than half an hour - give your child something from vegetables, but not sweet.

If your child is tired, unwell, something disturbed him - you immediately to calm him down, hold on his hands, he may even fall asleep. Let rest the nervous system in such a way - it will prevent a tantrum, which is sure to happen if you do not give the child the rest.

Parents and other family members must adhere to certain principles: if the "no" - always and everywhere, and if you "can" - that too at all and in all situations.

If the tantrum began, two methods are applicable: do not respond to it or to take the child in his arms and carry away from the place where it happened. The main thing is to do it quietly and silently. Talk with your child need after the tantrum is over. In no case do not shout at the child - he words in this state does not understand, but will experience a backlash that could affect the formation of his nervous system and worldview.

Svetlana Shimkovich

Lay your baby to sleep is not easy - resistance, tears, tantrums tire and parents, and of the baby. If the child is already well aware of it, one of the best ways to put him to sleep - read bedtime stories. It is important to do it every night, the baby was waiting for this. In addition, the need to remind him of the whole sequence of actions for which the time will come for the fairy tale. The child seems to be that "come to bed" - is terribly long and boring. If you talk to him that "in five minutes you can get out of the tub and put on his pajamas," "when put on pajamas, will have to brush your teeth - it will take another two minutes" and "when to brush your teeth, you can go to bed, and I tell you a story "- no longer seem an impossible task.

How useful a fairy tale?

Bedtime Stories help the child relax, unwind after a busy day in the kindergarten or school and fall asleep faster. In addition, it is an ideal time for the close association of parents and children. A few tips about reading bedtime stories:

• Before reading, make sure you and your child, it is convenient - you are sitting or lying down. It is best to find a bed or a couch in an embrace with a toddler.
• Encourage your child to choose a book that you read. This will give him the opportunity to feel like one of the founders of the process, not just an observer and consumer of the results.
• Encourage your child to read to you, too, but it is better to read at a time - you both enjoy!
• In the course of reading Ask your child questions, such as: "How do you think will happen next? "" Why the wolf could not blow the house of the third pig? " and so on.
• Read fairy tales in verse. Rhyming text easier to remember, and it is well coached memory and develops a child's speech.
• Engage in reading other family members. And it is not necessary to read the queue - you can make a role-reading with mom and dad, adult children and relatives and friends who are in your party. It strengthens family ties, and these moments are some of the most beautiful childhood memories.

Reading to children

Meanwhile, today's parents are finding less and less time to read it to their children bedtime stories. A significant reduction in the level of literacy among adolescents in no small part due to this fact. The working day is getting longer, and the inhabitants of large cities, in addition, a lot of time spent on it to drive to work, and from work - home. In the evening, they feel so tired that there are forces children to read. Often parents are returning home when the children are asleep.

Experts warn about the dangers of this trend. Parents are the first people to the child that lay the basic knowledge. Already they bear all the information obtained in a secondary school; Without this foundation, the training will be much less effective than it could be.

In this trend, there are other, perhaps more serious danger. Traditional fairy tales in the form of metaphors tell us about the possibilities of human adaptation to the world and reflect the conflicts that can arise when a person is trying to get in life what he wanted. The more we yield to basic instincts and the more often go for the easiest ways - the more devastating are the consequences of our actions. The more we interact with other people and take into account their interests, the better results we achieve. Talking about it helps tale effortlessly remember basic behavioral patterns and see their potential consequences, as well as learn the basic moral values.

This does not necessarily mean that children who do not read fairy tales, certainly immoral to grow in the traditional sense of the word. However, the likelihood that they will suffer from a significant psychological discomfort sufficiently large.