Everyone knows about the existence of stereotypes relating to the division of children's clothes. If it's a truck, it is necessary for the boy, and if you pack a ballerina, it is obligatory for girls. It is not necessary to follow the gender stereotypes in the division of toys. Even if you offer her son the brilliant colors, and his daughter - the train, the son would still be a boy who will turn your bed into a racing car, and the daughter will eventually be obsessed with shoes.

Scientists conducted a study in which eighteen boys and girls showed a picture with a doll and machine. As a result, most of the girls chose a doll, while boys are mainly chosen car. This study shows that in eighteen months, children are influenced by gender stereotypes. Experts say that many of the differences between boys and girls are evident from birth. And that's just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to gender studies.

You have a boy

If you have a baby boy, you probably already noticed that he could not live without movement - he was watching him and loves to participate in it (so you better stock up with green paint). In addition, boys are much more emotional than assumed. Experts advise to pay attention to the following character traits that are characteristic of growing and developing boys:

Boys love movement

According to psychologists, University of Cambridge, the boys prefer to observe the movement of mechanisms (and not the movement of living beings). Researchers have proposed twelve-month boy a choice of two sessions: let the people speak or watch the movement of the wiper. It is not hard to guess that the kid chose. It turns out that boys are easier to keep track of moving objects. Recent studies show that boys outperform girls in development for almost two months, when it comes to the laws of motion of objects (for example, the boys are aware that if the ball roll under the couch, it will be on the other side after a few seconds).

Boys move more

No wonder they say that the girls - talkers, and the boys - walkers. And that's only half the truth. The girls are really starting to talk first, but the boys begin to walk - with than boys develop motor functions all at once - about the same time as the girls. Proof of active mobility of the boys is the fact that they are more likely than girls squirm and fight. New studies show that boys are more prone to injury and need medical attention. Boys really are ahead of girls in all areas of physical abilities in the preschool years.

Boys tend to be more emotional than assumed

There is evidence that boys are more hot-tempered than girls, and they are harder to pull myself together. The experts' study showed that although the six-month and the boys were seemingly calm, in spite of the negative emotions, heart rate and breathing still showed that they are actually experiencing stress How to beat stress? Create an oasis .

Boys are like a lot of people

Boys prefer to watch groups of people rather than individuals. In fact, given the choice of newborn boys prefer to look at a moving person.

Boys fearless (relatively)

Boys are much less likely to express concern than girls. According to a recent survey, parents of boys between the ages of three to twelve months, less frequently than parents of girls, reported the child startle in response to loud noises and sudden movements. Another study found that when mothers, approaching its twelve-month child, did a terrible face, the boys were ignored moms and play. Girls also slowed the pace and expressed concern.

Many children misbehave not all, but only with individuals: father, mother, stepfather or stepmother, brother or sister of the bride (wife) and her fiance (husband). The following examples illustrate how the usually sweet and obedient child can be a real monster, to behave provocatively or even insult a specific person (usually a family member). Why is this happening, and what parents can do to fix this problem?

Examples of family situations

Example number 1: When Lisa got married, she was sure that her three children will love her new husband Denis just like it. Her eldest daughter, Dasha (16 years), never evinced sympathy for her stepfather, but Lisa thought that over time, the ratio will change his daughter, because Dasha has always been a good girl and never harbored resentment. But Lisa was wrong. A few weeks after the wedding, mother Dasha began to behave with Denis openly hostile.

He had only to make the slightest attempt to establish themselves in the role of caregiver to Dasha advice or chide her, the girl just coming out of himself, arranging scandal. After a big quarrel Denis found for Dasha "curfew" - she had to return home by a certain time. As a result, Dasha completely stopped talking with Denis does not say a word to him to him for two years. With all the rest of the family continued to chat Dasha and Denis remained only object of her anger.

Example number 2: Everyone who knew Boris, light, and their four children, have always considered them a model family, and constantly praised obedient, polite and educated children. But no one could have imagined that behind the closed door, the family idyll is far different. Fifteen Dima behaves like a tyrant, especially in relation to his mother and younger brother. Sveta he talked with threatening intonations, and the six-year Tolia openly intimidated, does not hesitate to use physical force. "When outsiders Dima - the very charm, - says Light. - But when we get back home, he turns into a completely different person. "

From birth, children have different attitudes to the people, someone like, and someone causes them frustration and anger. Even babies have different attitudes to the mother, nurse and family friend. Such differential treatment is maintained in the future, aggravated in the transition to adulthood Transitional age - the period of emotional turmoil . Contrary to popular belief, children are well versed in the people and all the surrounding divided them into two categories.

When the children get older

Who are the adult has the authority and strength of character, and who - no? What adults can be manipulated by bad behavior and who does not lend itself to manipulation? With age, children begin to understand who is an adult may not insist on his own, who just threatened to punish for misdemeanors and willingly believe (or pretend to believe) excuses, who are ready to hand down disobedience, and who seek to buy a location presents. Children understand who is an adult is always ready to meet even the most bad their actions, and who sets the rules and punish their violation.

When the child's bad behavior manifests itself in relation to a single person, it is a sign that the child understand that such behavior will go unpunished, and this person can not resist him. So a "weak link" can be a mother or a father, stepfather or stepmother, brother or sister. At first glance it seems that this behavior by the child receives no benefit and it is generally difficult to explain.

If the child insults his mother, he calls her insulting words, it is unlikely to help him avoid the consequences of punishment for bad behavior. In fact, he behaves this way because he feels worthless and is asserting itself at the expense of those who can not give him a rebuff, for example, the mother. The only way he feels strong. Such children suffer from lack of confidence in themselves, their abilities and skills. Humiliating the weak, it seems currently strong and acquires confidence. It's a simple, one might say, a primitive behavioral dynamics.

In order to understand why children behave provocatively with some people, in particular, with their parents, imagine you have a boss who you do not like. For example, that the boss constantly gives you a lot of hassles. How often do you dream about, to send it? Perhaps you imagine in detail what would you say to him, and what a relief and a pleasure to feel after this conversation.

Most likely, in the first fifteen seconds you will feel euphoric, until you remember that now you have to look for another job. The same is true with children. They speak with his "boss" and get the satisfaction of humiliating him. Moreover, they can do it every day, because most of aggression aimed at relatives and family members. In case it is Dasha, "said the boss," for two years (it contemptuous silence was more eloquent than any words).

If children show aggression toward his father or mother, they know how parents approach to education, they have the same views on education, or different. Dissociation of the parents - a kind of indulgence of bad behavior for children. When the father says one thing and his mother - completely different, the child can choose the view that suits him, and to use the split between the parents. He feels one of them "weak link", and it is constantly provoking or aggressive behavior in relation to that of the parents, who considers "unfair".