Raising a child - the most difficult and demanding job of all, for people who can take. At the same time carry out such a difficult job, people usually learn in the process when the child is in the house and retreat, as they say, nowhere.

The notion of how to bring up children, usually come from an environment in which people grew up. This often leads to the fact that people simply copy the methods of their parents, or do the opposite, if they believe that parents raised them wrong.

Parents - a role model

This is one the most important aspects of parenting, which we must remember every future parent. Children look at you and repeat after you. If you behave with others (including children) respectful, honest, friendly, if you are kind and generous, it is very likely that children will be the same. If parents quarrel with each other, children abused, cheated, angry and at the same time verbally teach children to be kind and honest, most likely, they will grow people for whom aggression, lies and double standards are the norm. Children are a reflection of their parents, so you should look at yourself and decide which of his traits of character you would like to see in their children, and then, if necessary, change their behavior.

Unconditional love

Parents should show their children unconditional love - that is, to love them, regardless of school grades, sporting achievements, and so on. This does not mean that the family is necessary to proclaim the permissiveness and impunity. Children can and should be condemned and punished for bad deeds, but they need to make it clear that you disapprove of it is actions, not their own. That is, will it be correct to say, "You're not done when the boy insulted (rude to the teacher / skipped a lesson, and so on)" rather than "You're a bad, bad, lazy." In the first case, you specify it in the act, in the second - describe him as a person, which is not good. In no case do not tell your child that you do not love him, no matter how you angry; your anger will pass, and the child will remember these words forever.

Why is it so important discipline

Discipline is necessary, first of all, parents. Being a mom or dad so - 24 hours a day to be ready to fulfill their parental responsibilities. This is especially true in the early years of a child's life, but you do not stop being parents to the end of life, so even before they have children, you need to discuss with your partner the degree of responsibility of this step. Parents who lack discipline and responsibility, the children grow up, which is difficult to adhere to strict rules and organize their activities. Therefore, parents should be disciplined themselves, and set clear boundaries of what is permitted for their children. In this way the child learns organization, respect for the law (including, and unwritten), and personal boundaries of others.

Spend enough time with their children

In order to properly educate children, parents need to find time to communicate with them. Due to the work of parents, schools and hobby groups who visit the children to do it is quite difficult. However, try to allocate each put a little time to communicate with the whole family - for example, during lunch or dinner. The conversation should involve all family members. Listen carefully to children and themselves, too, to tell them about their affairs. It is not necessary to dedicate them to the details, but communication must be two-way, otherwise children will withdraw into themselves, and you will be more difficult to talk with them.

Seated in front of the child and demanding a voice say, "Well, tell me, how are you" - not the best strategy. The maximum that can be achieved in this way - one word answers, backed by the desire to quickly end the conversation. Talk with parents of children should be familiar, normal. If you start to talk to a child only when there are problems, do not expect that he will be honest with you. Joint travel, trips to various events and sports, too, are of great importance in the process of education.

Do not encourage excessive consumerism

Even if you are able to buy baby phones latest models every six months, it is better not to do so. Explain to him that things should be, above all, functional, and if the old phone works well, it makes no sense to buy a new one. If you do not have a very high income, explain your child the value of things and the money is even more important. Every time a child wants to buy another one shoes, bag, lipstick or something else, ask him to explain what it is he needs to, and explain that before you buy something new, you need to throw away something old. Try to form the child's critical attitude to advertising (which usually calls for buying unnecessary). Let him pocket money, after explaining how much you have to work to get that amount. Perhaps it makes sense to tell how many work for the money the people of poorer countries.

If the child is already accustomed to a lot of things for him are not necessary, offer him a choice: for example, to buy a new player, or set amount that you would give him, people in need of financial assistance - for example, for the operation. So your child can understand what money there is not only to satisfy immediate desires. And, of course, when the child is old enough, it is necessary to arrange it to work during the summer vacation - Learn how to earn money, children usually change their attitude towards them.

Be consistent

If you warned the child that will punish him for violating the ban - is punished. Promises like "the next time for sure I will punish" fail. Similarly, if you promised to buy a baby gift for a good score, victory in competitions or for anything else, be sure to do it. Dealing with people who say one thing and do another, no one wants - and you're unlikely to seek to raise a man.

For any apparent adult - children need to play, but not everyone understands that many modern children do not have enough of these games. Experts recommend to promote games for children in which the child begins to play spontaneously; such entertainment, each different age.

The difference in the understanding of the game by adults and children

Various sports "games" - this is not a children's play in the real sense of the word: there is a child at least freedom for creativity and the adoption of its own, unconventional solutions - for this sport too strict rules. These can not be considered children's games and computer games, which many kids today are spending more time than other activities - not including school attendance and sleep Dreams: how to understand our dreams . Even infants are not enough games - instead they watch TV shows, which allegedly develop their brain, they go with their parents on developmental activities, and do so much more, except for one very important - they do not show initiative, do not create their own games with their own rules, the same flexibility as the child's mind.

Of course, sports and a variety of educational courses are useful for children - they really contribute to the intellectual development and can have a positive effect on school performance .  But no wonder they say that the good should be gradually .  Modern techniques, aimed at the development of the brain, should not crowd out what is almost as important for physical and mental health of the child, such as food, water and air - the good old game .  You have to understand that games for children - it is not only what we usually mean by this: many hours of tinkering with toy cars, building blocks of various designs, and so on .  Playground Child is the world around, and toys - all around .  For example, when a child is repeatedly throwing the spoon on the floor during a meal - he plays, his brain works and develops, he asked: "I wonder if my mother raise the spoon again? And further? What if you throw a spoon on the other side? It emits a different sound? "Such actions are so-called spontaneous games - that is, they arise spontaneously and do not have clear rules .  It is thanks to this kind of game, the child almost from the first day of life, knows the world - puts experiments and observe the reaction of the world to their actions .

Children aged up to one year

How they play: on the floor to drop available items, or missed something that caught the attention, and to pull yourself - it's not like the game in the traditional sense, but the babies play that way. Any activity that adults seem meaningless, and often causes irritation is due to the fact that the child's brain is actively engaged in the world around them.

How to support your child: The game should take most of the time that a child spends awake; in general, when he sleeps, he should just play and there, and sometimes to wash and change clothes. Most young children like to play with their parents. You do not need to do anything too complicated: just play with your child hide and seek (option for the little ones - you hide behind some furniture and then show because of her child, and then hide, baby, meanwhile, is beginning to understand that the facility may be next, even if it is not visible), clap her hands with him, to give him the opportunity to learn the buttons and patterns on your clothes, and so on.

Buy baby toys, designed specifically for his age group - a variety of rattles and hanging toys. They are safe and effective in stimulating the development of the brain.

Give your child the opportunity to crawl freely. The time when the child begins to crawl, is quite disturbing for many parents - they are worried that the baby can reach dangerous objects that his mouth would be exposed to germs, because he knows the world, not only touching it and seeing it, but also trying to taste. All this is true, but it is better to worry about how to remove potentially dangerous objects out of the way of the child, and regularly clean the floor and did not allow anyone to go beyond the corridor in outdoor shoes. If you comply with these precautions, the child is unlikely to be serious danger (unless, of course, he has a normal immune system), and it will be able to play virtually all over the house before learning how to walk.

Children aged 1 to 3 years

How they play: In this age, children are becoming more curious and develop large and fine motor skills to help them learn everything - from kitchen appliances to the tail of your pet.

Most young children love to society peers, but they usually play side by side, but not together (this is called parallel play), because at this time, they consider themselves the center of the world and is able to work poorly.

How to support your child: buy him toys, providing maximum space for the imagination - cubes, balls, dolls, and even such simple things as wooden spoons and box from under the shoe is much better stimulate creativity than toys that do one thing: for example, talking animals, or cars with remote control. Simple wooden horses and men, with whom the children were playing our ancestors, developing brain is much better than the toy robots - playing with the first child can "dovoobrazhat" anything, and interactive gadgets have nothing to add.

Remember that you can not only play in the sandbox or in the nursery. Sculpt cookies in different shapes, blow bubbles to catch flying autumn leaves - you can invent games with your child, no matter where you are.

Children aged 3 to 5 years

How they play: The development of speech at this age children do these storytellers - they are projecting their fantasies onto the world, and their games are becoming more complex. At the same time they begin to play with other children, and often give birth to the first friends.

How to support your child: Many parents are rushing to teach preschool children the basics of reading and math, which, in general, the good, but it should not be given too much attention - is now much more important than the game. Make sure that the child has the opportunity to play with their peers - give it a kindergarten, or explore with the children of neighbors and friends.

Limit the time that children spend on the computer. While there is no evidence that computer games are beneficial to children, but it is known that abuse can lead to obesity, poor vision, and a number of other problems.

Pay attention to what your child likes and provides appropriate opportunities for gaming. For example, if your child likes to toy animals, you can spend a vacation in the countryside, and to introduce the baby to these animals. If your child loves a variety of "construction" of the game, buy it all the more complicated constructors, and stand with him.